Despite All Those Opinions — Still Your Decision to Make!
How many times have you wished to challenge yourself to explore an attractive new opportunity or pursue a major accomplishment and then stopped short of making an actionable plan or taking the first step simply because someone at home, work, or elsewhere was against it, expressed a dire concern as to the potential risks associated with your undertaking, or some other form of dissuasive statement, AKA argument?
I’m asking because, when it comes to taking personal initiative and responsibility for our health, career, money, wealth, or success mindset, there is a common tendency to use others’ opinions as reference points even when those aren’t necessarily accurate or needed, and we especially exhibit this tendency while consciously or subconsciously seeking one reason after another to avoid full commitment. It is, presumably, a subtle form of self-protection, of justifying our own insecurities. Yet, considering how frequently it takes place in people’s daily lives, it isn’t subtle at all.
Aside from the fact that I’ve never truly understood the habitual inclination displayed by many to cater to relationships that contribute nothing to their personal growth or well-being, as in the multiple cases that come to mind of people not willing to establish a strict healthy-eating regimen out of fear it would interfere with their social lives, I am also quite intrigued by this whole rationalization ingredient that’s barely hidden in most of these relationships, likely making them more attractive to those in the habit of using them as shields to their own indolence and complacency.
This type of clinging onto relationships that perpetually hinder personal growth is one of the most widespread forms of procrastination on important goals that call for dedicated time and undivided attention if we are serious about obtaining measurably successful outcomes. The problem is that most meaningful or impactful goals hardly get accomplished within short time periods, which is the main reason that people with poor self-esteem and low confidence prefer to put off the starting point, sometimes indefinitely.
The example given earlier with regards to a healthy diet regimen only touches on the health life aspect, and partially at that. Fitness discipline ‘under the influence’ of certain friends or loved ones has also shown to be a monumental challenge for those who are fond of talking about their impressive goals yet end up never making it beyond the talking phase. And, we all know how crucial the people who want to shape our decisions can be as far as our financial choices go, short-term and long-term alike!
Do you like sticking with the wrong crowd and their suggestions and ideas for years due to fear of the unknown, fear of judgment for deviating from the status quo, perceived lack of self-sufficiency or good resources, utter dread of being uncomfortable, strong aversion to independently thinking for yourself, or a little bit of everything? Which of these describes your current mindset?
If you’re feeling hesitant to explore and take action towards a desirable life-changing opportunity because those closest to you deem it unnecessary, unimportant, risky, time-consuming, cost-prohibitive, or all of the above, do you ever consider that they could be subconsciously projecting their own fears and personal limitations onto this opportunity that may not even affect them as much as they’re presuming it might? In close relationships, limited-mindset projections can be no less powerful than imposed unhealthy lifestyle habits or financially detrimental habits, because not everything that’s been ingrained in their minds over the decades is automatically valid for your situation. Hence you need not let the guilty feeling that comes with the called-for detachment from their ideas and purposes prevent you from distancing yourself enough to make it possible to pursue this opportunity by implementing the action steps needed to move forward.
This doesn’t always imply cutting bridges, but at times it may have to come to that, depending on how strong of a conflict we’re talking over something you wish to explore and pursue legally, morally, and ethically. You cannot be or remain afraid of disagreement, rejection, conflict, or adversity if you expect to accomplish anything major in life, and these uncomfortable situations most certainly include the people in your closest circle.
To make it easier for yourself to sort through the implications of such life-changing decisions, do your best to not only envision the gains from following through on your aspirations but also the potential regrets you may feel a decade or two from now should you decide not to follow through. Sometimes, seeing our future selves as the regretful individuals we could very well end up being for not giving a dream the deserved shot can have a stronger impact on our decision-making today than the perceived gain of which, realistically speaking, we can never be certain as nothing is ever hundred-percent guaranteed. See yourself in the future and weigh your desire against their viewpoints as many times as it takes you to finally leap forward and just do it!